Johnny WALKER!!!

I knew I knew him!!  All he was missing was the top hat and tails!!  OK they spell it with an ‘ie,’ but no matter.  Probably didn’t want to incur the wrath of copyright lawyers.  This is too funny!!


“Yup, Just Business, Honey, don’t you worry your pretty little head about it…”  What a tool… even in the time warped Trail-verse, this notion is simply unpalatable.  And let me apply my mind control techniques on your doddering father- these aren’t the droids you are looking for…  “That was ridiculous garbage being spewed by Trail…”

But the best line in a month of Sundays came from Mark Himself:  “Johnny REALLY came on STRONG!  I WONDER WHY???”  And he means that.  Oh Clueless, Thy name is Trail…  What’s it like to live in your world?!?

And clearly, the fact that the vehicle Mark is Driving has headrests and a shoulder belt suggests that he had to get on a plane and rent a car since no vehicle in the current Lost Forest fleet is new enough to sport these safety features…

Candelabras and Gilded Frames?

Seriously?  Silver Service? White Linen?  Lake home?  I guess I just don’t appreciate how the political elite rolls…  Despite being massively under-dressed, the Senator maintains his composure and his good cheer, despite the fact that Johnny the pit bull is straining at his leash…  wanting to take down Mark with a single blow, all while “protecting” the Senator from undue influence and impositions onto his busy calendar…  More than anything, Johnny is protecting his “meal-ticket” and can’t (literally) afford to let the Senator go off-message or stray too far from the feeding trough.


And as usual, there is absolute role clarity in the Trailverse.  Women prepare food.  Men eat food and discuss weighty matters…  Lather, rinse, repeat.

Stupid Wildlife? Tree Hugger?!?

Those are fightin’ words, Mr. Brylcreem!  I guess Johnny IS cross…Of course Johnny has a personal interest in seeing the Senator re-elected…  that’s how this works, Marky-Mark… Lower suckers and sycophants attach themselves to higher order Parasites and keep the whole thing propped up by buying and selling influence.  It’s call government.  And it’s coming to a town near you!


Now won’t dinner be fun!  Do you think Mark will stick around, now that he has been properly called out as one not “on the Senator’s Team” or will the base layer of the needs hierarchy prevail as Mark’s stomach growls and calls for food followed by black coffee?

And what hell is that in the tree in panel two?  A little early for Breast Cancer Awareness Month?  Or maybe not…

Oh, Johnny looks cross!

Dinner is going to be tense.  Not that Mark will “feel” any of the emotion, blind as he is to other’s feelings…  Oh to live simply, to be unaware of what others are thinking and feeling, must make for a much simpler life, you know?  Not that I would trade, mind you, but Mark’s ability to walk into situations with such linearity of thought and narrowness of view requires much less cognitive energy…


And such foreboding in panel one, taken up mostly by the black bird of doom.  It’s not a very good Raven, if that’s what it is supposed to be, but we will take the Chinese colorist’s interpretation of the moment and paint the episode black…

And Mark, Really?  “Best for the country?”  Your stance is annoying, one that could only be taken by one that has had his life fall into place without a lot of effort and hasn’t had to worry a whole lot about what puts the roof over your head or the horse under your saddle…  Little people need to be aware of what fuels their enterprise, literally, while you maintain fanciful notions of life as grand while we deal with thorny issues like achieving energy independence…

I understand???

Well I don’t.  “I am going to help Ann Marie in the kitchen” is code for… what?  I need to leave the room?  I can’t stand being around you? I need to leave you and Johnny alone so he can rough you up a bit?


But of course the dinner invitation is accepted at the first mention.  Mark is accustomed to being fed wherever he goes.  Other than the odd shore-lunch of freshly caught trout over an open flame, this man knows nothing of preparing food…  “I wonder if they serve coffee in this joint,” he must be thinking…

And there’s Johnny, looking all chisel faced, hewn from the granite that no doubt makes up the sub-strata of the lake bed where all of the Senator’s political enemies lay sleeping… with the fishes.

# 200

No, not “hash-tag 200” but rather I just threw up my 200th post for this blog.  And still I have not garnered a single fan.  Granted, I have done nothing to “put myself out there,” and really, I do this for the enjoyment of a small audience that I know follows this idiocy…

It’s become part of my daily routine, so as long as Elrod and Co. continue to grace the page, I will be here snarking away.

Have a Mark Trail day, everyone!


I see…

Oh, Mark, you are surrounded!!  Let’s see, when was the last time you engaged with the political elite?  1958?  Things HAVE changed a bit since then, Old Friend.  It’s a different world, where money DOES talk, and Bullshit walks…  Your writing and thinking have now been called out TWICE for being a “bit idealistic…” not rooted in the reality of the modern day.  You see, we all have i-Phones or Galaxies…  With all the talk of GREEN and FOOTPRINTS of CARBON, most of us really couldn’t give a real damn, since we are mostly concerned with have the power to light up all of our various devices…


And what would those “Matters” be, Senator?  One can only imagine… With a brand like “Hudson Mason,” how much campaigning really has to go on?  And clearly the interests have made their way into his old, leathery hide, and with that awesome ‘stache and genial smile, how could you not trust this guy?

Wearing your hair a little long, though, aren’t you Johnny?  That’s a mighty big tip-off in the Trailverse for a person who is less than forthright and stout of heart…